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Vampiric Scarecrows

Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 2:17 pm
by Jamz
I'm sure this will be a world-wide thing that happens, and it's not just us poor Brits who have to suffer it.

So you're out shopping - either walking around a shopping centre (or 'mall' if you're a Merkin), or pushing your trolley around a super-meer-kat (the little furry bugger shouldn't be in your way anyway!), and you're suddenly pounced upon by some shady Tit-Rag who was standing to the side like some kind of hungry buzzard.

"Sorry to disturb you Sir/Maddam (and that's a -ing lie for starters!), but have you heard/can I interest you in/how much do you/etc???"

Oh yes! Here they go!

RAC membership, life assurance/insurance, buttered -ing pigs on a stick - whatever they're trying to sell that day!

If you believe them, this is a deal that you cant possibly miss!

Yeah - 15 years ago, maybe!!!

Is there a single one of these anywhere who has ever been able to get you the best deal on something?

I'm pretty damn sure that whatever they are selling - with the possible exceptions of buttered pigs on a stick - I can get cheaper online.

Yes, I'm challenging them! I reckon a 15 minute search will get me their product cheaper than what they're offering it to me!

Even if I can't find it cheaper directly, the chances are I can use a cashback site and use that to get it cheaper!

There is no place for these guilt-inducing, vampiric fucktarded scarecrows!

So f*** right off and never speak to me again!

Think you'll make me feel bad for ignoring you as I walk passed? Believe me, it's better than swinging you around by the fucking eyelids like I'd like to do!

ARGHHHHH!!!!!!

Re: Vampiric Scarecrows

Posted: Fri Nov 28, 2008 2:44 pm
by masterofinsanity
pmsl :pmsl too true mate, and the buggers that go round knocking the doors trying to sell you stuff, sorry but everyone knows its cheaper to buy online 99% of the time due to having less overheads so why f*ckin bother?

Re: Vampiric Scarecrows

Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 9:17 am
by gingernm
Most annoying fuckwits have got to be the door to door double glazing knobheads.......

They always manage to knock the door just as you're eating your tea!

They don't seem to notice they have just knocked on a uPVC double glazed door!

When you don't answer they stare in your uPVC double glazed window, see your eating and then knock on same window!

You go open the double glazed door and they start.....

We're in the area.... just done some work up the road..... offering huge discount, but only today....... would you like a free estimate for double glazing?

You f'ing retard, what the f have you just knocked on and looked through to get my attention???? Well??? Yes double..fecking...glazing!!!
My food is getting cold because some moron wants to replace my double glazing with double glazing!!!

Stupid knob gets offended when told to feck off and get a real job and a new pair of specs as he obviously can't see! :wanker